Last Saturday my sister had her 82 birthday. She did not celebrate. She is lying in a nursing home almost as helpless as a baby under hospice care while Parkinson’s disease racks her body. Most days she is mentally alert and we talk frequently. Something we haven’t done in years.
This is my only sibling who is 3 years older than me. I visited her in California, where she has lived the majority of her life, right before I moved to Zihuatanejo. She and I have never been close and at times our relationship has been quite contentious. But we have recently discussed this fact and analyzed it but we could not come to any conclusion except that even as children we weren’t close. So we have chalked it up to just very different personality types.
Since I am her only relative (other than my children) she has come to rely on me for some companionship even if it is long distance and we have both discovered how much we are enjoying this fleeting time together. Growing up I was often quite envious of her as she was the pretty one, the popular one who charmed everyone she met. As a young woman she had a glamorous life as a chorus girl dancing at Lake Tahoe, Reno, Florida and San Francisco, while i was busy becoming a fat housewife with 4 children under foot who’s thought a Cub Scout Blue and Gold Dinner was a big social event. I no longer envy her. And I am so sorry she has to suffer through this horrible disease that has twisted and tortured her body until she resembles an old crone. We both now wish we had been closer through our lives, but we are having to settle for some very high quality phone time.
Here in Zihuatanejo my calendar is quite full, with a couple of weekly lunch groups and now a dinner group. Zihuatanejo is a very supportive place for older single women who still have a zest for life. I not only have Christmas Day plans but plans for Christmas Eve and even Canadian Boxing Day. It is impossible to be lonely here, which was one of my main reasons for moving here. Of course I am well aware that “off season” the social life will not be a full whirlwind of events, but I have friends that do live here year round and maybe that will be time to resume Spanish lessons or take up some other new hobby.
Signing off KO
Zihuathyme 